Questions?????

So many questions....So many frustrations. Right now I sit here writing this post and I think to myself I KNOW GOD is there. I KNOW he's my provider. I KNOW its in his timing and I KNOW its not my way. BUT dang it! I have been praying. I have been trying to live my life for Christ the very best way I know how and dang it I have been doing a good job of it too. SO why in all of this do I feel like God simplely isn't listening? Why do I feel like I am going to drown in this misery? I FEEL FORGOTTEN right now. And yet I KNOW I am not forgotten! But I need a huge Miracle!! A financial miracle is more like it. I am tried of ecking by and I am TRYING to get out of this hole but it seems the harder I try the worse it gets. NO I am not doing it in my strength if that is what you are thinking. I am trying to figure out the balance between trusting in God and going out and getting it done. As in hearing what he wants me to do and going and doing it. I mean I know he can have someone knock on the door but I also know I have to do part of it too. I sure hope this is all making sense! God is a good God ALLLLL the time....I have experienced it! But right now I am in the middle of this crisis and cant see the light at the end of the tunnel yet! But did you see that? I said YET meaning I have a hope for the future . I have a knowledge that God will pull through for me. He is my Abba and my father his plans for me are of good always. I am just struggling right now to get thru trial....Its only going to make me stronger right?